i’ve beckoned to the light and it shone bright enough to create a shadow i’ve fallen for so irreparably it has become my home.

i wrote these things with you in mind and i wonder if the reason why you rarely express how you feel is because you can’t.

at times i’m so overwhelmed with how much i love you i often ask myself am i worthy of being in love?

often when you struggle with finding your hands and i offer you mine i wonder when you see them, when you see my hands being given to you to find yours do you understand this is a kind of sacrifice i enjoy?

lately when your hands found their way back after i sang to them, and when your demons danced with the angels’ melodic hymns did you discover their power when they stand side by side instead of in shifts of morning and night?

the earth hears me whispering ‘give him angels, give him your soldiers, give him goodness- please give him goodness.

because he is good..’

it remembers the raspiness of my voice when i’m seconds away from tearing my throat open to voice out another prayer before i cry, and it answers me with patience.

patience patience patience- i don’t know her.

i don’t, but for some reason she knows me often when i struggle to maintain my dark.

when you disappear

when you stop talking

or take too long to talk

when you yell at me

when you yell at me

when you break

when you forget me

when you are lost

and often so very often when i am reminded of the beautiful things i create for us i also anticipate all the beautiful things you will create for us with the hands that lost their way from your arms.

then i remember again…

what i can do you can’t

what i am you are not

what i can do



and that isn’t a flaw in you or in me..

its simply two parts of the same coin

god and mortal

light and shadow

song and silence

you and me..


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